broken hearts are beautiful to me

i want to hold them close, wrap them up in silk, softly

they remind me how human we are,

of the innocence and beauty in this world

because if your heart can be broken, you have one

tender and still beating, if only faintly

pen in hand, head full of thoughts, churning questions desperate to be worked out through ink onto leather bound pages

reaching forward– suddenly nothing

… the paper remains blank, still

calmy void of meaning, from their white faces they laugh at her reasonings and uncertainty

in silence were the very answers she sought

driving aged and winding dirt roads as the summer sun sets, crickets and coyotes in the distance, windows down

standing on a mountain top, those beautiful jagged peaked Selkirks

the smell of fresh mountain air, mingled with damp cedar and pine in the gentle rain

in these spaces i find peace, rest, a familiarity that runs deep

and in every day places still unfamiliar, 

in solitary moments, 

i miss you

we all feel disconnected and lonely sometimes, and think that no one understand us or how we feel in that moment 

i wonder really how much of that is pure perception 

because there are days when i stumble across something so simple or perhaps beautifully written that perfectly describes exactly how i’ve felt

and days when i’ve stared surprised over my coffee mug to a complete strangers story with thoughts of “me too”

how it is that a perfect stranger could ever know my heart so well

and i think it’s a beautiful thing, these cords that run through us all connecting humanity like a giant tapestry 

we are not so different, you and i

we all are made of the same flesh and blood, created in the same image

sometimes seeing that is a simple choice 

📷 google

sometimes you just want to get on a plane and go 

but instead you stay 

because in the staying is where reality happens, in the hard of everyday, where heart and healing meet 

you know you’d miss it too much, anyway 

and also if following your heart means anything after all,

 you stay 

and this is how it goes

sometimes you risk in life, in love, and win when you let your heart speak

and sometimes you risk and lose

and that is life

sometimes you will feel horribly acutely racked with sorrow, and sometimes you will not

i wish i could say there is always something of a divine purpose in all of it

that all tears and disappointments will someday be revealed with great purpose

but all i can say with certainty is that is life, and this is us making the best we can of what we’ve  been given

but through it all i hold to this one thought

that just to be alive is truly a great thing

to be able to feel and cry and laugh and love is indeed a good gift


📷 google